Life, chaos, and grief

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It's been a bit since i've written. Life just flies by. I think part of the reason i havent written is i find myself wondering what to share. So I'm just going to be real. Life has been hard these past few months. Actually, a few years. The most challenging is my inability to get my house in order. I want to be able to get to the place to have people over again and they have a place to sit. I want to be able to have dinner at the table, or play games, or build a puzzle. But theres just so much stuff, everywhere. And then we got a puppy, because having a full house with two children isn't enough. My husband brought her home. I get it, i've done it. but we weren't ready for a puppy. In the middle of all this, my sister-in-law died from a complication during surgery. The reality of grief has hit a whole new way, and all the "firsts" without her were immediate, like the next day! Oh and don't forget, menopause arrived! And then another grandbaby was born-which she was so looking forward to holding. 

So what do you do? We know life doesn't pause. And of course having another grandbaby was very exciting. My emotions have been all over the place for so many reasons. But i will tell you, moving forward this time has been hard and full of emotions. 

I have not figured it out. there are days i just go through the motions. but there are also good days. It's just been challenging. And i wanted to be real. Obviously i've left out a lot of details, but that's ok...

One more thing...I really need to find things to do. Not a huge social person and most things are during the day, but there has to be something right?

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